A separated hymen is not an indication of having had intercourse, nor can it prove a loss of virginity. In fact, some women must have their hymen surgically removed before the birth of their first child because it is so flexible or small that it remains intact during intercourse.[1]Point two would have to be that not all women have hymens. Point three would have to be that hymens can break in several different ways. The University of California Santa Barbara's sex information site has the following information.
The problem with reading too much significance into the presence of the hymen is that a woman may still be a virgin even if she does not have an intact hymen. A woman may not have a hymen for a variety of different reasons. First and foremost, she may have been born without a hymen, or without much of a hymen. In addition, many women tear their hymen, enlarging the hole, through nonsexual activities-- such as engaging in sports, horseback riding, insertion of tampons, etc that put tension on their hymenal tissue. Women are often not even aware that their hymen has torn, since there may be little or no blood and no pain. Sexual intercourse is only one of many reasons why a woman may not have a hymen.
In many societies, however, people think that the only way a woman breaks her hymen is through sexual intercourse. As a result, if a woman does not have a hymen she is immediately thought to not be a virgin. Problems arise in countries whose values and beliefs place great importance on a woman's virginity. In some Middle Eastern countries, a woman is not supposed to lose her virginity until her wedding night. It is then custom for the husband to show off the blood stained sheets that supposedly prove his bride was a virgin. But what happens if the woman does not have a hymen, or simply does not bleed for some other reason? She may risk being shunned by her family and new husband. The woman may even be returned to her family as "used goods," stoned to death, or banished from her society.
The hymen carries a great deal of importance and symbolism even in the United States. Men and boys alike are sometimes eager to "pop the cherry" of a girl, though the reasons for this are unclear. If a girl does not have a hymen, but loses her virginity to her boyfriend, did he in fact "pop the cherry?" In this case, the word "cherry" is clearly associated with virginity. This is obviously a false association, but unfortunately one that lingers. We can only hope that as more people begin to understand the basics of human sexuality, these false myths will be eradicated.[2]Point four would need to be that even if a hymen tears during intercourse, not all women bleed. Therefore many women would be unable to produce the bloody sheets.
When the hymen is separated, whether during first intercourse or at some other time, there may be some slight bleeding and a little pain. Both the bleeding and the pain are quite normal and both usually stop after a short time. Some women experience no discomfort at all during this process that is commonly referred to as "losing your cherry".[1]
Below the fold are some reasonably graphic pictures of anatomy:
